dispatches from the blue

Well, family and friends, it’s been a good run. You’ve been here for the past 17 months of my life … the good, the bad and the fugly. I started this blog to keep in touch with those of you who live in distant places, but mostly to just write, to have an outlet for the everyday musings of a 21st Century dilettante. (I think I am misusing that word, but I like how it sounds.) I wanted to have a place where I could ask you all to weigh in on the gruesome details of other people’s lives (and wives) and sometimes on the dirrty details of my own. In the 21st century, having one’s life transcribed on the Internet sometimes seems like the only way you know you’re alive.

Right now, I need to reserve every ounce of writing power and energy that I have to finish my thesis: a collection of 15 short stories called “Misbehaving.” As Ayelet Waldman taught me, sometimes you just have to reserve the words for your art.

Perhaps this is not a farewell, more of a sweet audieu until some time. Actually, my big idea is to revamp my website, perhaps with the help of the designers at Exobi or RoarMeow, perhaps a combination of the two. This blog was always supposed to be just one small part of my internet presence. You see, I will be back — bigger and better than you ever imagined me.

The last two months were a hurricane, a destructive blizzard of emotion and travel and meltdown and joy and experience. All of a sudden the decisions that are looming in my life after I finish school [where to live-how to make money-how to sustain my relationship] seemed immediate. I felt as though every breath I took, every sentence I said, would have dire consequences, rippling forward to ruin the rest of my life. I could hardly breathe. The storm seems to have passed or else I am firmly esconsed in the eye, and everything seems okay. I have to deal with my shit, for real this time. For real for real. Whoah. Am I ready? Are the rest of you ready?

Regardless of the drama, the last few months have also been filled with joy and amazement. In true deference to this blog and a promise to my man, I will leave you with one final picture of a place I visited in my “exotic” travels over the past three months. Don’t forget about me. Peace, love and g-strings. –NB